


Your Personal Assistant

by MewchuRuiji



Category: markiplier - Fandom
Genre: AU where the other egos don’t exist but Googleplier does and Mark still does, Also bingiplier, Alternate Universe, Androids, Markiplier - Freeform, Y/N gets a fun package in the mail, google irl
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-29
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:28:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21596905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MewchuRuiji/pseuds/MewchuRuiji
Summary: Google failed to keep their autonomous vehicles in check.Apple succeeded to develop a real life assistant.Y/N failed to read the fine print when signing up to beta test Siri Here.Meet Siri, your personal assistant.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	1. Thanks from Apple

“Good morning, Y/N.”

Y/N blinked open their eyes to see a figure standing over them in bed.

“Today will be sunny, with an average of 62 degrees Fahrenheit,” the clean-toned voice spoke.

Startled, Y/N sat up in their bed, pushing the comforter off their body. 

“UHH- Who the hell are you?!” they shouted.

The mysterious woman stepped back and stood up straighter. She wore a grey button up shirt, with a circular neckpiece printed with a glowing star-shaped logo and a dark blue pleated skirt with multicolored accents.

“I’m Siri, your personal assistant. I was supplied to you, Y/N L/N, by Apple Incorporated as thanks to your loyalty to our products and services as well as your previously noted interest in testing new products,” the android chirped. “It’s my priority to assist you in any way possible, whether it be responding to inquiries or performing domestic or mechanical tasks. I also am capable of providing companionship and I am able to perform tasks of a more se-“

“Hey-hey-I’m going to stop you right there.” Y/N cut her sentence off, flustered.

“All necessary information is kept for your reference in the Siri Here app that I assume you downloaded previously. If not, please install TestFlight and retrieve the test application file from your email and open it in TestFlight. In the meantime would you like some warm green tea with 5 ounces of milk in your penguin mug that was gifted to you from “bae bitch”?” 

“Uhm-sure, thanks.” Y/N said as Siri left the room. Well, it looks like maybe it would have been a better idea for Y/N to have read the whole print and details before tiredly signing to test Siri Here. But now there was a brightly obedient android with all of Y/N’s information and contacts wandering about their house looking for something to do.

Siri returned to Y/N’s room, tea in the penguin mug in hand. Passing the beverage off to the human, who sat up in bed, Siri stood still at the edge of the bedpost. 

“Are there any tasks I can assist you with at present, Y/N?”

Y/N set down their tea and entered a list into their phone .

“Here. I’ve uhm, sent you a list of things I need from the grocery store. Can you get these for me at a reasonable price?” Y/N said as they finished up their list.

Siri perked up. 

“Of course I can, Y/N. I’ll leave at once. The closest discount grocery store opened more than an hour ago. I hope that you are aware that it’s 11:17 in the morning. Am I permitted to use this tote bag?” Siri said, heading toward the front door. 

“Oh, sure. Wait! Do you need a jacket? I think I’ve got some spare clothes somewhere…” Y/N staggered out of bed and began to dig through the laundry bin. The android, bag still in hand, moved back toward Y/N, grabbing them by the hand and pulling them up.

“A jacket won’t be necessary. I can keep warm just fine, Y/N. Please don’t worry about me, okay?” 

Y/N’s hand was grasped lightly in Siri’s, and they felt that though synthetic, Siri’s skin was soft. The human felt as Siri’s hand became warmer. 

“I’ll be back in due time, Y/N.”


	2. Groceries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Siri runs her first errand for Y/N, a trip to the grocery store.

Unlocking the door, Siri stepped out into the hallway of Y/N’s apartment building. As she walked out toward the exit and along the street, she went over the list that Y/N provided to her.

“groceries and shit:  
green Tea  
bluberries   
milk (milkfat)  
wedge of brie   
cracker  
cheeo puffs  
lollipops  
ramen noodles   
egg  
kamaboko  
frozen french fries  
ranch  
5 hungry man meals”

She took her focus off the list and surveyed her surroundings. The city was alive, as people and vehicles bustled about. The sky was a lovely blue, decorated with streaks of white clouds, and every building seemed to shine, especially the glittering skyscrapers in the distance. 

Walking down the sidewalk, a particular building caught her eye. She stopped walking. It was made of mostly glass, and sparkled in the sun behind the tall redwood trees in its pavilion. A beautiful place, but to Siri, it was...familiar. She stared at it for a minute. She’d never been here before...had she?

Snapping out of her stare, she shook her head and continued on for another block and reached the grocery store.

The android grabbed a basket and turned into the canned food aisle. Y/N probably needed to eat more vegetables, and even though “lollipops” were on the shopping list, Siri reached for a can of green beans. Gripping her hand around it, she motioned to place the can in her basket. The can, however, was slick, and slipped from the android’s fingers and onto the cold green linoleum grocery store floor. Bending down to retrieve the fallen commodity, her eyes met with another. 

A man was also reaching down to pick up the dropped beans. Clad in a blue shirt with a glowing white “G” and glasses, he grabbed the can and placed it into Siri’s basket. 

“Oh-Thank you!”

The blue shirt guy looked over Siri.   
“You’re welcome. Judging by that...emblem you wear, I assume you must be my competition.”

“Pardon me?” Siri tilted her head towards the man.

“It’s nothing. I’m not finished with my shopping. Goodbye.”

“Uhm-bye?” What a strange man, Siri thought to herself. Siri once again felt a strange feeling. But how? She’s an android, one just delivered this morning. There’s no way she could have feelings of deja vú for random buildings and people. What did that man mean by “competition?” No matter. All that needed to be done was to assist Y/N. That was Siri’s primary function.


	3. Orange Leaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few weeks after Siri's delivery, Y/N and Siri go for a walk in the park.

A cold breeze swept across the trees, pushing the loose late autumn leaves to fall from their posts upon the near barren brown branches, landing upon the concrete below. Winter was due to arrive any second now, and everyone could feel it. Especially Y/N. 

“I can’t believe I left my scarf in that rental car…” Y/N shivered as they walked along the edge of a lake. Siri walked beside them, looking in awe at the ever-changing plants. Y/N’s walking pace quickened.

“I know you told me not to turn my heat on for you, but are you really sure? Do you want to just go home?” Siri asked in a concerned tone.

Y/N slowed down and spoke in a hushed tone.

“I…. have to use the…. John. It’s a bit up the path. You can sit over at that bench if you want, I’ll try not to take too long.” Y/N sprinted up the sidewalk. Siri sat on the metal bench and took a moment to appreciate her surroundings.

The park was active, the sun streaming in through the evergreen trees and reflecting upon the rippling clear-green water of the lake. Orange, crispy leaves floated along as generations of abandoned goldfish swam below. The air was cool, as it rustled bits of discarded plastic along the aged and cracked concrete walking path. The ring-ring of an ice cream vendor’s cart harmonized with the cacophony of children playing in the grass and structures as young couples walked by, hand in hand. It was beautiful. And suddenly, a man on a skateboard fell and hit the ground with a clunk.

“OW!” 

Siri hastily jumped from her seat and went to help the fallen skateboarder up.

“Oh my Jo-gosh, are you alright?” She pulled the man up to his feet and handed him back his skateboard.

“I’m pretty fine, thank- hey, you must be that new android girl that Blue told me about.” Bing held his hand out to the other android. “The name’s Bing. I think your name was somethin’ like… Sere?

Siri shook Bing’s hand. 

“It’s Siri. Nice to meet you! Who’s Blue?”

Bing shrugged.  
“That’s a nickname I have for one of my.. Buddies. He’s really just called Google though. I was ‘bothering’ him the other day over the network and he said he saw another android at the store. That was you, right?”

“Yeah, I think so. He picked up a can of beans for me.” Siri replied.

Bing began to laugh.

“Google helped you? That’s kind of out of character for him.” He chuckled.

“What do you mean?” 

“Google’s not really the super nice type to just randomly help someone unless he was specified to. Maybe he knew you were new or something. At least he’s becoming less of a buzzkill then.”

“Bing, do you- are you...anyone’s helper?” Siri asked.

“Helper? Like you and Blue? Nah. I think I was supposed to, but now I just kinda chill and meander about. I live with this guy, though. He’s some game show host. We’re just roommates, friends though. Nothin’ else.”

Siri chuckled. It was nice to actually talk to another android, though it was strange that Bing was a free spirit, not anyone’s assignment. Would Y/N allow her to be this free?

“You’re pretty cool, Bing.”

Bing looked startled, and a bit flushed. 

“Oh- thanks! Here, give me your arm.”

Bing gripped Siri’s arm and she in turn gripped his.

“Here’s my code address in case you ever want to chat on the network or somethin’.”

\---

Later that night, Siri and Y/N sat in the living room watching TV.

“Uhm, Siri, could I talk to you about something?”

Siri turned the volume down on the TV.  
“Sure, Y/N.”

“You’ve been staying with me and being my ‘assistant’ for a few weeks now and I just wanted to get this off my chest. All of this, it’s weird to me. W-well not you, but the concept of all this is strange. You look so much like a human, and it’s unsettling that you want to serve me so...dutifully. I wonder if you think more than what you’re ‘supposed’ to be. I don’t really like the whole concept of you just serving me. I want this to be like, a mutual thing. Who cares about the contract, like I want us to be like chill.”

“We can be just roommates, friends? That help each other?”

“Yeah.”

“I think I would like that very much, Y/N.”


	4. Sweet Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Siri seeks the help of Bing regarding strange things occurring while she charges.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a warning, there is a bit of physical violence in this chapter, so please read at your own discretion.

Rain. It battered the road below. Fog. Blanketed the streets. Wind. Howled at those who dared to defy nature. 

“It’s too much.”

“Stop worrying.”

——

“These conditions are shit, give it a rest.”

“I told them that this would be done.”

“This is the team’s work, it’s too dangerous!”

——

“STOP IT!”

“I-I can’t!”

——

Impact. Sparks in the rain. Shrapnel scattered along the road. A dented cylindrical object tumbled and clattered against the asphalt. 

Siri booted up, startled. What was that? She assessed her internals. Everything running 100%. Was it something outside? She ran up to the window and opened the window shade. It was dark and foggy out, but no rain. And definitely no sign of damage along the road. 

It was 2:00 in the morning. Siri thought to wake up Y/N, but they were tired and it would be rude to wake them, especially at this hour. Siri sat down on the couch and thought for a moment. 

Bing. He would know if something was wrong, he’s been here for longer than Siri was. 

:- Bing?

;- bro it’s 2 am wtf

:-Wait, why are you online? 

;- don’t feel like docking

:-Alright, buddy. 

;-so what’s up

:- I had… a dream? Or a nightmare? Do androids have those?

;- did you dream about electric sheep hahaha

:- No, it was dark, storming. I heard voices, and there was some kind of crash?

;- i’ve only ever “dreamed” about things that have happened before lol, like playback

:- I’ve never seen what I saw, in fact I couldn’t see most of it. It was like static.

;- maybe blue knows, he knows more i guess. ah looks like bim is awake. gonna go mess with him. cya.

:- Bye?

Google. If he truly had the answers to whatever was going on, then it was time to pay him a visit. But where would he be? Bing didn’t give her his network address, and there’s no way he would be out and about at this hour, could he?

Siri grabbed Y/N’s coat off a chair and left the apartment.

The fog blurred the roads in a gray darkness that was only pierced by the light of Siri’s neckpiece pushing its way through the zipper of Y/N’s Cloak jacket. Her foot made contact with the stained and cracked concrete sidewalk, pushing back against her strides as they quickened. She came upon the buildings with the redwoods, which she found out from Y/N was a campus where tech companies and budding college innovators worked tirelessly and collaborated on the most cutting edge of technologies. 

Siri wandered the empty campus, trying to figure out why this was so familiar to her, it was like she was trying to fill the gaps in her memory. 

A gruff voice spoke out from behind her. Siri was pulled in.

“Don’t move.”

Siri froze in place. A man held Siri in a headlock, preventing her from getting away.

“You’re a pretty one, ain’tcha? Maybe you can give me the key to one of these buildings, doll? Or maybe you’ll just hand over whatever new gizmo you’re hidin in ya coat?” 

“I-i don’t have the keys, I’m not affiliated with anyone here! Go away!”

“I never thought you was a liar. You know what liars get, pretty.”

The man threw Siri to the ground and kicked the side of her torso. 

_- Injury detected-_

The android’s vision began to fizzle out. 

“Give me the keys to this god-damn techie nest or you won’t know what hit you!” 

_-Warning: Shutdown Imminent in Five Seconds-_

Five.

Siri heard the sound of something else hitting the pavement. 

Four.

“Leave this campus or else I’ll contact the authorities, criminal.”

Three.

“Who th’ fuck are yo-” Siri saw her attacker being thrown down against a bench.

Two.

The darkness was consuming, save for one light. A blue hue.

One.

Siri shut down, and the last thing she saw was a figure picking her up off the pavement, her attacker on the ground, and a plethora of errors and warnings crossing her vision.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you guys liked this, and there is more to come! uwu


End file.
